Colbert Nation/Derrik
Background Derrik is the Nation's resident european, and a native of Iceland. He is a haggard fisherman by trade, and is in the process of building his fleet. No bullshit involved here, dude is actually an arctic fisherman. His hobbies include, but are not limited to: *growing his beard *staying warm at night *smelling of fish *speaking funny, and in multiple languages *hunting whales *smoking hash BOMB Squad Rank: Realizing that Derricks beard posed a possible threat to his, Eaglebear has made Derrick the VP of the BOMB squad and has placed him in charge of the European, African, and Australian wings of its military contracting firms. As of now, he holds the rank of 4 leaf General and has been issued a purple heart (for being forced to shave) a Bronze star for valor in the face of munchies, and the ZZ Top Cross for beard length. Salaam/Shalom Derrik is one of the stars of a 2006 sitcom (which never aired) entitled "Salaam/Shalom" where he plays an Icelandic convert to Islam sharing a flat in New Jersey with an Irish convert to Judaism from California. A running gag in the show is the character Derrik plays is constantly plagued by the belief that his Jew flatmate is trying to take over the world, and conversely the Jewish character (played by the Nation's very own SoCal) is convinced that the Muslim is trying to blow up the world. In the pilot episode the two characters (who lacked names in the script and were refered to as the Jew and the Muslim) are presented by their landlord with a smoked ham for Christmas, hence the title, "Salaam/Shalom: and the Christmas Ham." Hilarity ensues. The show was meant to be a satirical portrayal of the deep seated bias different cultures hold of one another and how the clash of culture affects the individuals involved, but more importantly how silly many preconceived notions are and how we as members of humanity share far more than we differ; as narrated by James Earl Jones. Memorable Quotes *"For a while, yeah, but I've been moving rancid bait all day and now I smell even worse" *"I feel more bamboozled than hoodwinked, personally, but to each his own, I suppose." *"An Ashkenazi Jew... interesting. Not because it ends with "nazi", though, mind you, they're just an interesting people." *"I had shaved and trimmed it up heavily in preperation for the drag party. Now, where's Dex and his Quote-A-Member fetish when you need them?" *"I never really liked the show as such but I watched every episode. That Dreyfuss chick does something to me." *"My ex once asked me whether I was giving her something for this stupid little day and I said a black eye might be an option if she reminded me again" *"I can't remember any more at the moment, but I have a sneaky suspicion that the more I'll remember, the worse I'll feel." *"We have a saying here that goes "Laun heimsins eru vanþakklæti" Which would mean "the only thing you get from the world is lack of gratitude" but it sounds a lot better in Icelandic." *"Strangely, an army of gay circus clowns Vatican's Swiss guards does not strike that much fear into my heart. Regardless of their javelin skills." *"Yeah, I know; mother already explained how people are laughing with me, not at me"